Tag: self-love

A Poem for Love for Me

Post author By ojinoto
Post date November 3, 2024

I found this poem tonight. I had written it on 4/4/2013 at 1am. This was a poem I wrote to myself; I was realizing and learning how I needed to feel love, instead of just logically knowing that I was loved. At the time I was referring to romantic love. Now I can probably expand this beyond that:

A Poem for Love for Me

It is not enough for me to know I

am loved, I need to Feel it.

I need to feel I am loved.

A week ago I realized a baby portrait of

mine has had barbed wire attached to

it all these years, literally. I could

not hold the portrait tight. I could

not hold it right.

Then I realized, that baby needs to be

held, not looked at. Not put somewhere

to be looked at. He

needs to be held.

And that is me. And it is a daily occurrence,

daily need. I need to feel it

everyday. Anything else is not enough.

Because When I don’t, I shrivel up and recoil,

and get cold and bitter. I cant live like

that.

I need to grow and open my heart,

open up, and bloom. I’ve come too

far, I must

continue opening and growing

I May forget these details, but my heart

will not. My heart knows

that it needs Love it can feel.

My heart will not let me

stay with anything else.

-Dr. Orlando Fernandez

Tags love, romance, self-love, warmth

Chillin Inserts

Kintsugi – Living with the Wounds, Instead of Without Them

Post author By ojinoto
Post date April 28, 2024

Was told about this art form, kintsugi. When I looked it up, one of the first things it says is “As a philosophy, it treats breakage and repair as part of the history of an object, rather than something to disguise.”

That hit me hard. You know we all have wounds. Whether some are from earlier or later in life, or both. Some deeper, some more surface level. I guess I had thought that healing means completely recuperating in a way where the wound is no longer visible, impactful, or perhaps even memorable. But how realistic is that? And, who are we if we get rid of these wounds?

Wounds can be beautiful too. Maybe it depends on how you incurred them, why, and what you do with them – how you carry them. They are part of us, aren’t they.

Tags acceptance, beauty, heal, health, self-love, wound

Chillin Life Is Yours Using The Brain

Meaninglessness, and Feeling Meaning

Post author By ojinoto
Post date December 2, 2023

I have been struggling off and on with feeling meaning. It comes in waves. It’s difficult to define how long this last one was, I think it was on and off for almost a year. It was more on struggle this autumn until a few weeks ago.

I think there were a combination of things that helped alleviate it. My mom helped me paint to a much brighter color in my living room and bedroom. And she shared with me a meditation which put me in a purer state of Presence when listening to it. These things helped a lot.

One of the greatest contributions to my sustaining more meaning in these recent weeks is drastically reducing the noise that my brain listens to. I live by myself, and during my free time I’m normally listening to news, sports content, talks, etc. When I cut out all those things and just sat quiet while eating, while cleaning, while brushing my teeth, etc., I was in effect spending more time with a part of my self.

While I care about what’s happening in the world, possibly the greatest meaning is found within my self. Or at least, it was a huge factor that was not getting any attention to Be, and be Present, and quiet. Quiet so that I can discern and feel the meaning that exists in the fabric of the moment.

I feel a lot better now, having cut out a significant amount of distractions from my free time. I automatically sense more meaning in the moment.